Mishappiness

To avoid feeling like a total idiot in this foreign country, I like to collect all the menial activities and interactions where I can't function like a capable human being and file them into a mental folder called "Mishappiness." It turns all of my mishaps into funny memories rather than embarrassing asshat moments.

Examples:

1. The Shower 

These shower dials hate me. To the left is the flow control (even thought it says Thermostat). The right is the temperature. Easy enough right? But notice the red button.. that must be pressed to let the shower know you want to set the temperature or get hot water. And every single shower is different. (I've taken several cold showers because of these.)

2. The Doorknob

Door and window knobs here have this excellent function where you can open them by swinging the handle up and then stabilize it by moving the handle in the opposite direction so it will not swing freely. But it also means that to lock a door, you must have the handle in the correct magic position. This took me ages to figure out.

3. The Wall Outlet

What a cute, happy fellow right? Not when you've spent the whole evening "charging" your phone only to realize that you have to flip the switch before power starts to flow. Add in that it produces twice the voltage as the ones at home and you get dead electronics very quickly.

4. Dual Flush Toilet

This one might not be a bad example, as it is pretty clear which is which. On others I have encountered, the two buttons are in the same hole and I can never tell which to press because they both move together anyways. That sounds confusing. It is.

5. Encountering Warning Signs

While riding my bike in the countryside, I came across this sign and used my handy off-line translator to read it. I found the words "Watch out," "dog," and "beware." So I took it to mean "Watch out, there is a viscous dog around here," so I turned around and went back the way I came. David later told me it says "Watch for dog. Drive carefully." As in, "I love my dog, please don't hit him with your car, you non-bike riding heathen." 

These are just a few I collected during my 1.5 days here at the airbase. I'll post others as they arise.

Hope you're having a lovely day. Hej hej!